Cue the Pity Party (Updated)

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Every year around this time, I have to have myself a pity party.  I never know what exactly will trigger it, but I watch and wait to see what sets me off.  Today, I got my cue for my pity party.

My husband is generous to a fault--and that is one of the reasons why I fell in love with him.  Sometimes, though, I wish he were a bit more selfish.  And he is what caused me to feel sad tonight. 

Way back when, K scheduled vacation time for Christmas.  The Youngest and her husband have been coming home and spending Christmas with us for several years and had/have every intention of doing so this year as well.  But, good intentions don't always turn into good things--or don't in a timely manner.  The S-I-L is one of the 'low man on the totem pole' employees where he works, so he isn't in a great position to dictate when he will take time off.  For the last few years, he has used his lack of asking for off-days during the year as leverage to get holiday time, but he doesn't feel as if he should push it this year.  So, here we are, a week before Christmas and we STILL don't know if the kids will be with us for 'THE day.'  As nerve wracking as this is, I can live with not knowing until the last minute.  I'm not going to do much more if they show up, than what I would do, anyway.  I will find out in due time if we will have company, or not.

Now, back to K.  He is one of the top 10(?) in seniority where he works.  (He may be even higher on the list due to retirements, but whatever.  He is HIGH on the list.)  He can pretty much dictate when he wants to take time off and get it--which is a perk for having been there as long as he has.  My husband certainly doesn't abuse his position, however.  For example, he makes sure (as much as possible) that he doesn't ask for time off during hunting season, so that the ones who DO hunt can have THEIR time.  He also is very good about giving up holidays to people with young families.  We don't do big 'family' visits for Easter or the Fourth of July, etc, so he will gladly work and let someone else have the time.  And this year he has made it known that he will give up his Christmas vacation if we don't get The Youngest here.

Every few days, K has been asking me if I have heard whether the kids are coming, or not.  Tonight I told him that I STILL don't know what the plan is and he told me that he will be canceling his vacation when he goes back to work--that the time is winding down and a decision has to be made.  He is doing this so that one of his co-workers--a guy who is at the plant as a bit of a second-career sort of thing (basically NO seniority, whatsoever), with grown children (that he sees often during the year), and no grandchildren--can have the time off to be with one of his kids, who will be here.  So, if our daughter doesn't come home, I will be here, home alone, for Christmas.  And that has caused me to have a pity party for myself.

I know that this isn't the end of the world and that I probably will be relieved to have time for myself, but right now it doesn't feel very good.  This very possibly will be as low-key of a Christmas as we have had in quite some time.  And so, I will wallow in pity for a time and then pull myself up, slap myself upside the head, and say "What the F*** is your problem, woman?"  And I know that all will be right with the world.

UPDATE:  Just spoke with The Youngest and they WILL be here for a couple of days next weekend.  They won't get here until Christmas Eve and have to leave the day after Christmas, but they will be here.  What a difference 24 hours makes!  :)  (And K's vacation will stay in place--thank goodness he wasn't at work today to change things.)