Thursday, February 10, 2011

I Would Own A Gun, But...

We just got back from a several day road trip.  While this doesn't REALLY have much to do with the rest of this post, I must give a little update on what we did.  This was our trip to go and see the play 'Wicked.'  I have only one word for the experience:  WOW!!!  Words just aren't enough to say how much I enjoyed the play and performances--ESPECIALLY the performances.  I'm not sure I would have loved this as much if the part of the Wicked Witch would have been played by someone other than the girl who was in Tuesday's performance, because she was absolutely amazing.  I don't know when I have heard such a powerful voice come out of such a (relatively) tiny body.  But, this amazing time began with our traveling and my wanting to own a gun...

I've said on more than one occasion that there are two reasons why K won't 'let' me own a gun.  First, he'd be very afraid that he wouldn't see his next birthday if I had a gun at my disposal and, two, if I didn't do him in, he would be afraid that I would leave a long line of drivers dead by the side of the road.  And Monday gave me a good indication of how right he is to be afraid--some drivers don't deserve to LIVE, much less have licenses.

I sleep whenever we travel.  It all started when I was kid and had car sickness:  The sleeping helped keep me from getting nauseous.  Sleeping had/has become such a habit with me, that I continue to do it to this day.  I have told K that I HAVE to sleep because he makes me so nervous with his driving--and he IS a good driver, I'm just a nervous passenger.  I found out on Monday that I need to sleep just so I don't have to experience the OTHER drivers on the road.  I usually sleep until we are within a mile of our destination, but on Monday I woke much earlier than usual, so I got to see what goes on when I'm passed out.  And it was more than a little frightening.  As I was stretching and attempting to clear the cobwebs from my sleepy mind, I began to pay attention to what was going on around us.  And there are some drivers--most?--who should not be on the road.  This is what I saw in a mile-long stretch as we were racing down the interstate at 70+ MPH...

  • The first driver I noticed was hugging the center line and I pointed her out to K, while telling him to watch out.  As we passed her, I saw she was fixing her hair as she drove down the highway.  Now, she wasn't just moving her hair around, she was fluffing and combing and straightening and patting her hair with BOTH hands.  WITHOUT any hands on the steering wheel.  No wonder she couldn't keep the car moving in a straight line.
  • The very next car we passed was being driven by a guy, who I am CONVINCED is a serial killer.  I SWEAR, when he glanced at me, that I saw flames shoot out of his eyeballs.  And I KNOW he would've ended my life with just a little more than a look, if he wanted.  I'm completely sure his picture is hanging in the post office...he was very, very scary.
  • And finally, the third car we passed was being driven by a guy, also.  Now, 'driven' probably isn't the proper term for what he was doing, because I have no idea HOW he was steering this vehicle.  The first thing I noticed about him was that he had an iPad in his left hand and he was reading it.  Yeah, while going down the highway.  BUT that wasn't all.  He also had a cellphone squished between his right ear and shoulder and was talking on it.  And it gets better.  He was WRITING on a pad of paper with his right hand.  I know, I MUST have seen wrong.  Nope.  I looked more than once just to make sure I saw what I saw and didn't imagine it.  I have no idea how he steered the car--and I don't know if I WANT to know.
So, in the space of one mile, if I had a gun, I would have shot and killed three people.  Maybe K has a point and I WOULDN'T be a responsible gun owner.

8 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:08 PM

    We're on the road tomorrow. Hope it goes smoothly and we will not encounter the people who don't take driving seriously.

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  2. And FAR too many DON'T take it seriously, unfortunately. Be safe.

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  3. Im very glad you do NOT have a gun. I would hate to have to come visit you in prison!

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  4. The gun/freeway thing...you and me both, sistah. I always said if I had to drive in to the city for work I would be homicidal.
    I can't believe the iPad, notepad, phone guy. Good effin grief.

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  5. meleah: Well, it does my heart good to know that you WOULD come and visit me. :)

    kristi: We don't normally see drivers like the ones in the cities, thank goodness. We just have the idiots that don't know how to drive in the snow, even if it is only a few flakes.

    Yeah, the iPad/phone/notepad guy was off the wall. I really couldn't believe what I was seeing.

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  6. Of course I would come visit you!!

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  7. Anonymous10:09 AM

    Maybe it's best not to look at what other drivers are doing instead of paying attention to the road. I just watch what their cars are doing. I don't need more gray hairs than I already have!

    Though I've often wished I had a paintball pistol to mark the erratic-driving cars as a warning to other motorists, but probably I'd get shot with a real gun if I did.

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  8. Oh, I don't notice most of the drivers when I am driving--too much else to pay attention to. ;) K has the same idea about the paint gun--and said he would LOVE to see just how colorful some cars would get. :D

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