Thursday, July 30, 2009

Beating A Dead Horse

Two recent reasons why I don't watch the news:

--I am sick to death hearing about Barack, the professor, and the cop sitting down and having a beer together. The entire story just went on way too long, but STFU already about the damn beer! Am I supposed to think that this makes Barack a 'common' man? This whole thing would NEVER have been such a big deal--and I'm talking from the beginning of the 'story'--if the MSM hadn't kept at it like they have. This never should have been more than a one day story, at most.


--And come on already, how the f***ing hell much longer do we have to be subjected to the Michael Jackson 'story?' I'm waiting for the big news to be the inventory of his underwear drawer! ENOUGH!!! I'm crying 'uncle!' It can stop.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Links

I've seen some pure awesomeness online this past week--and here are the links.

**********

--3-D Murals. I can't tell what is real and what is a painting in some of these pictures. Unbelievably amazing! If you like the pic shown, go here to see more.




The ENTIRE side of this building is a mural--including the person shown. What a talent this artist is!

**********

--Creative grave markers. Okay, so you die and get buried. Usually, a headstone is placed on the grave so that your family can find you again. Not often do you actually find a headstone that is very interesting--until you find one of these.


I DO like the one that says: I told you I was sick! ;)

**********

--Simon's Cat. Anyone who has EVER been owned by a cat, will be able to appreciate these videos. Here is one of my favorites.



CLASSIC!!


Randomness

For the last couple of days it has been a bit on the cool side. We're talking around 70 degrees or less. YAY!!! However, the humidity has been in the 4962% range. BOO!!! We are experiencing cool, damp conditions--DUH!!!--and it is getting a bit old. EVERYTHING is wilted and clammy--including me. The humidity in our bedroom is over 75% and I'm afraid I'm going to start seeing moss growing on the walls one of these days. Uncomfortable doesn't quite cover the way things are.

**********

Early Saturday morning there was an apartment fire 'back home.' Four people were killed. Arson is suspected.

I hope the person who did this is caught and strung up by the balls. Out in the middle of the woods. Where the mosquitoes, black flies, coyotes, bears, and other wildlife live. Till he screams for mercy. And no one listens.

**********

The Youngest--my animal lover--has a sick cat. He is one of her oldest and will undergo tests--including an ultrasound--tomorrow. She is just devastated. I feel so terribly useless. I wish I could help her. :(

**********

Our local Junior A hockey team has set its roster and put out the schedule for this year. Seven of last year's players are off to college, so there will be a very different look to the team. The team seemed to be in some trouble--financially--but is still here for the year. They did so much better last season and hopefully will do better this year. It is very good for the area and local hockey to have a Junior team here.

Once again, there will be a 'Paint The Rink Pink' game for breast cancer awareness. I want to attend, as we did last year. I'm hoping that this year they will have a teddy bear toss again. I was sick all of December, so wasn't able to go last year. I have two bears to contribute, so really SHOULD get there. The season starts on 25 September, so I only have two months before hockey begins!!!

**********

Celebrity sightings!!

Apolo Anton Ohlo and Mark Spitz have been seen in our town recently. But NOT by me. :)

Our local university is an Olympics training center, so people come here to train or tryout for Olympic teams. The speed-skating training was held here earlier this month and the trials will be here in September. Apolo Anton Ohno was one of the skaters here. He has won five medals in previous Olympics.


Every year there is a charity swim for diabetes that takes place on one of our local lakes. This year, Mark Spitz came here for the event. (NOT to swim, just to speak.) He was a winner of nine gold medals in the Olympics. Before Phelps won HIS medals, Spitz had the most gold won in a single Olympics. He won 7 in 1972.

WOW!! We are getting to be a hot-bed of celebrity activity around here. ;)

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Saturday Funnies

From I Has A Hot Dog:



Mother Goose & Grimm:

Look In A Mirror!!


I have said before that I have the body of a goddess--unfortunately, it is a fertility goddess, like the one there-----> ;)

I suffer from no illusions--I KNOW my body isn't what it once was, but whose is? Age, two pregnancies, breast-feeding two kids, a hysterectomy, thyroid problems, stress eating, boredom eating, being sedentary, and genetics have all taken their toll on me. I could have a better body if I tried, but I haven't. What I look like is mostly my own fault and I don't try to fool myself into thinking it is anything BUT my own fault.

All that being said, when I leave the house, I try to fix myself up to the point where I won't scare small children who might come in contact with me. I do an okay job of cleaning up, I guess. At least MOST kids don't run screaming when they see me. That's a positive. I check myself out in the mirror before I leave the house just to make sure everything is in place as it should be. Unfortunately, all people don't do the same.

Tuesday evening, K and I went to our neighborhood pub to have something to eat and play a little trivia. Things were going well--we were getting our usual number of questions correct (which means we weren't going to win a thing ;)), I was enjoying my stingers and the nachos we ordered, and between questions we were watching the Tigers beat the Mariners. As I said, things were going well. And then I saw it. THE woman. Wow. She was a few years older than me and was dressed well enough. The problem was, she forgot to put a bra on before she left home. Now, MY boobs hang low, but this woman was something else. I SWEAR her nipples and navel were having a three-way conversation! And to top it all off, the only person I had to talk to about this, was my husband. Who didn't see a damn thing! Where, oh where, is my youngest when I need her? She is the ONLY one that could appreciate this situation with me. Anyway, that was something that I will not forget seeing for a long, long time. And I really wish I could.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Insurance

Don't get me wrong, we have wonderful health insurance--and we are blessed with prescription insurance, as well. If it wasn't for insurance, I would not be using Enbrel, as it costs WAY too much. For the three months I have been using Enbrel, the regular cost is about $10,000--I only paid $30. Now that I am on maintenance, this year's cost will be about $25,000 (total) and I will pay $120 out-of-pocket (total.) As I said, wonderful insurance. However... (you KNEW there was going to be a 'however,' didn't you?)

The day before I saw the dermatologist, the insurance company called the dr's office and asked if my prescription would be refilled. The dr's office called me and asked for any pertinent info, but we put the refill request on hold till I saw the dr. Yesterday, the nurse faxed my prescription in--as per the preferred method. Today, I got a call (pre-recorded) from the company asking if I wanted them to get in touch with my dr in order to get a new scrip. BUT, before this, they had sent me an email saying that they received the fax from the dr's office, yesterday, and were working on filling it. So, to sum up: the company calls and tells me they don't have a new prescription for me, but they send me an email saying they DO have one. Obviously, the right hand doesn't know what the left is doing. And this goes on ALL. OF. THE. TIME. We'll get reminder emails AND phone calls about needing to refill a prescription one time, but have to remember on our own the next week. Sometimes we get MULTIPLY reminders about something and sometimes, NOTHING. No rhyme or reason behind what is happening. This bureaucratic bullshit drives me absolutely crazy, but there is nothing that I can do about it--except come on here and piss and moan. ;)

LOLCats

I Can Has Cheezburger today.






Laughing 13

Thursday, July 23, 2009

About The Bear

One of our neighbors told K that a bear was caught the other day, two blocks from us. Is it our visitor? Who knows, but it makes sense that it probably is. I hope so. It would be nice to close this out.

Three Month Check-up

I had my three month visit with the dermatologist today and I have 'graduated.' As of the first week in August, I will be doing only one injection per week of Enbrel. She was very pleased with my progress--as am I--and thinks there will continue to be improvement. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

So, how exactly do I feel about the Enbrel therapy? As I told the doctor: Things are better than I imagined, but not as good as I hoped. All in all, I will take what I have and hope it all gets better.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Ducks

In the infinite wisdom of the powers that be, wetlands are being constructed everywhere. We have at least two within a couple of blocks of us--one borders the local medical center. Not only do these swamps bring TONS of mosquitoes and other bugs, but ducks make them their home. Tonight we went to feed the ones at the medical center. Sadly, the young ones are almost as big as the parents already. We saw at least a dozen ducks, but I could only get a picture of five in a group.









Construction

The work on our street is almost done. The other half of our street still isn't done to the point where the paving will begin, but we were told that the work will be finished by the end of the month. We can only hope.

K took this picture from the upstairs bedroom window--this was when they were replacing our sewer line.



Our front yard after the work was completed.



The driveway after it was prepped for paving.



The new driveway. Our first! YIPPEE!!!

And Now I'm Titled

If you haven't read Meleah's blog yet, you should find the time to do so. She is a funny, wonderful lady who I have gotten to be friends with through our respective blogs. With all that she has had to go through, she is an inspiration with the way she keeps her sense of humor. Anyway, she has a lot of good stuff over at her blog and you will be glad to know her.

You know how people will give others nicknames? Well, Meleah gives people 'titles'--long, descriptive, unwieldy paragraphs that are 'spot on' when it comes to showing what said person is all about. She honored me by giving me a title. Here it is. (All pictures, graphics, and red colored words are MINE--NOT part of the title.)



A woman Whose Hockey Obsession Stretches Far Beyond Unhealthy,









And Lives For The Red Wings,






And Has A Totally Super Inappropriate Crush On A Particular Hockey Player That Happens To Be Younger Than Her Youngest Child [Who She Often Refers To As Her 'Baby Boy'--The Hockey Player, Not Her Child.] (He is just TOO adorable for words! And he can play hockey well, too.)



And Suffers Serious Hockey Withdrawal During The 'Off Season' Depressed And Literally Counts The Days Until The New Season Starts, (check out the side ----->)


Who Answers To The Initials CMK,


And Writes The Blog: Out Of My Mind, (AND Out Of My Mind Over Hockey :)) Which Includes The Funniest 'Police Logs' In The History Of The World,


Who Is Positive She Would Get A Divorce If They Ever Tried To Build A House, (Facebook update)


And If She Ever Moved Would Take Her Toilet Bowl With Her,


Who Is Not A Big Fan Of 'Hall And Oates' Unless They Are Coupled With A 'Keyboard Cat,'





And Could Only Handle Watching Five Minutes Of Jon & Kate,


Who Has Issues With Chipmunks,


And Loves The Show Eureka on The Sci-fi Channel (NOW known as Syfy. {gag}) Because It's Smart And Funny, Made For Geeks And Non-Geeks Alike,




Who Prefers Toaster Strudel Over Pop-Tarts,





Who Enjoys The Security Of Onstar,




And Has A Crush On Michael Westen. (From the series Burn Notice on the USA network.)



Otherwise Known As Christine.


I laughed till I cried when I read this! Thank you, thank you, thank you Meleah. Love you, my dear! xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Bear Update

Around 6:00 PM on Wednesday, we received a call saying the bear was wandering around a neighbor's yard. Our block is bordered on two sides by a thick stand of trees/woods, so that is where the bear probably has been hiding. K went out to sit with one of our neighbors with the hopes of getting a picture of the bear--didn't happen. And the number one reason it didn't happen was what K was afraid: people wandering around looking for the bear. I guess the word went out and the 'woods' were crawling with people--there even was a woman pushing/pulling a baby stroller out there. I can't believe people.

So far, we have heard no word on whether or not a trap has been called for. I guess if the bear becomes a nuisance, or enough people call the city, the DNR--or whoever--will come out. Just what I'm waiting for.

Bear 2

Very Interesting

I finished reading Mark R Levin's book Liberty and Tyranny and must say that I would recommend it to anyone. It made me think, see some things differently, and supported a lot of my beliefs with factual evidence. Unfortunately, the people who most need to read this would rather burn it than open the cover. Hopefully this country will stop the decline it is in before we reach bottom. With my pessimistic personality, I don't know if we CAN turn it around in time.

Not Always Right

A couple of good ones today from Not Always Right.


I COMPLETELY understand this woman--I would be upset if a Wings' game was interrupted! ;)


Customer: *on the phone and angry* “HOW DARE YOU RUN AN EMERGENCY ALERT DURING THE RED SOX GAME?! BASES LOADED!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry for the inconvenience. We have no control over the emergency alerts.”

Customer: “CAN’T THEY DO IT AT NIGHT?! I’M TRYING TO WATCH THE GAME! BASES ARE LOADED!”

Me: “Again, ma’am, unfortunately the emergency alert will broadcast during an emergency situation; we have no control over when that will happen.

Customer: “WELL YOU BETTER GET SOME CONTROL OVER IT!” *click*



And from the 'please don't let her reproduce' file:


Me: “Hi, welcome to **** Music, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m having a little trouble with this CD.” *holds up a Carrie Underwood CD*

Me: “All right, what’s the problem with it?”

Customer: “Well, I was listening to that song, you know, ‘Before He Cheats’.”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “Well, the lyrics don’t really make sense in one part.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Well, you see, she says, ‘I may have saved a little trouble for the next girl, because the next time that he cheats, you know it won’t be on me’.”

Me: “…”

Customer: “You see, she hasn’t really helped the next girl at all. She’s saying he’ll cheat again, and that it won’t be on her, so it’ll be on the next girl! That next girl isn’t being helped at all!”

Me: “…so there’s nothing wrong with the CD itself?”

Customer: “The lyrics don’t make any sense at all!”

Me: “Ma’am, if the CD itself plays correctly, then…”

Customer: “Well, I’m saying it DOESN’T play correctly! The words are wrong!”

Me: “Ma’am, there’s nothing I can do to change the lyrics of a song.”

Customer: “Can’t you just call her up, and make her change them? I mean, really, it’s in her best interest, since her song would make more sense, and more people would buy it that way!”

Me: “Ma’am, let me be sure I’m understanding you. You want me to somehow call Carrie Underwood, and have her change the lyrics to her song, which has sold millions of copies, because you don’t approve.”

Customer: “Exactly! I knew someone would understand. The other store I went to didn’t help at all!”

Me: “Ma’am, are you saying that, not only is the actual CD playing without skips, and the disk is not scratched, but that you bought it somewhere else?”

Customer: “Well, yes. So, can you call her?”

Me: “No, ma’am. I can not.”

(The customer refused to understand that I could not, in fact, change the lyrics, and spent another 10 minutes trying to explain why she was upset.)


ROFL 7

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Where We Live

Along with hunting and fishing, there are those here who trap regularly. As you can see from this picture, they will trap ANYTHING here in the UP! :D




If you can't tell, that is a snowmobile caught in an ENORMOUS bear trap. This is outside of an ironworks business up north from us.

Adventures With Wildlife

We took a ride up north this evening to bring our grandson his birthday gift. Surprisingly, we didn't get to see too much in the way of wildlife, but I was impressed with what we DID see. We saw a total of five deer--not a lot, for sure--a bald eagle sitting in a tree--absolutely breathtaking!--and a coyote--which looked very healthy. I'm not sure if the dryness of the area is what kept the critters in the woods, but they were not active tonight.

That being said, we did have activity in our neighborhood this morning. K looked out of the front window around 6:00 AM and watched a black bear wandering in and out of the yards on our street and finally made its way onto the bike path and took off. I REALLY was not happy to hear this. Now I will have to take care when I go out in the evening--DON'T want to meet up with a 150 pound bear!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

I Just Don't Understand

Shortly after Barack took office, I was walking through a store and saw some tabloid headlines saying that George W Bush was "depressed and suicidal." I overheard someone tell her companion, "He SHOULD think about killing himself after what he did to this country."

WOW.

Just WOW.

How mean, petty, and just plain UGLY is that remark.

If I said that Barack should think about killing himself, I wouldn't be surprised if Blogger closed this blog. I could just about guarantee that Facebook or Twitter WOULD suspend my account if I said that on either of those sites.

I just don't understand some people.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Seriously Funny

I have been known to makes errors when I speak. I will mispronounce words or use the wrong words or trip over my tongue in one way or another. My mind tells me WHAT to say, but the mouth doesn't respond correctly. K, on the other hand, doesn't do this very often. Until yesterday.

"Do you think that C would want this?" K asked, pointing to a page in the catalog he was holding.

"What is 'this'?" I asked.

"This autopsy cookbook." he said.

Me: "..."

He was pointing to an AUTISM cookbook.


Laughing 3

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Another Reason Why I Am The Way I Am

The Father has a younger cousin who, along with her husband, were very close friends of The Parents during my early years. Somewhere around my middle-school days, The Cousin and her husband moved downstate. (We're talking about 8 hours away.) The only time The Parents got together with them, was when they came 'back home' on vacation--which would have been about once a year. As The Parents NEVER went on vacation, ANYWHERE, they always relied on people coming to them to visit.

As it would happen, when someone came back to my hometown area, a 'get together' would usually be planned so that all the family could gather in one place and visit with whoever was on vacation. Most of the time, if it was The Father's family member, his younger sister would be the one having the party. This ALWAYS was a source of irritation for The Mother, as this woman wasn't/isn't one of her favorites. (But then, who DOES The Mother actually like, I ask you?) This would cause The Mother to whine and piss and moan and say how much she didn't want to attend--but she WOULD go for The Father's sake. (This happened ALL. OF. THE. TIME. whenever his family was involved.) And, just as inevitably, The Father would make the pronouncement that he WAS NOT GOING. BUT, The Father would say, The Mother would have to come up with the excuse and make the phone call declining the invitation. And I would have to listen to them argue back and forth for days about this--her saying she was not going to make the call and him saying he was not going to call, but they would not attend no matter what, etc, etc. And I heard this from a very young age. It was quite unnerving, to say the least--and it is most likely one of the biggest reasons why I don't care for family.

Another big reason why The Parents wouldn't attend these shindigs was The Father's way of thinking. He decided that, since whoever was around and was on vacation, THEY should be the ones going from house to house visiting and paying homage to those who lived in the area. After all, THEY were on vacation and had the time to do the visiting, not those who still had to work. And it didn't matter if the vacationers were around for two days or two weeks--The Father figured their time wasn't nearly as valuable as his. The fact that he came from a big family and most of them lived in the area, didn't seem to matter to him. Somehow, the vacationers were supposed to find the time to visit in each of the 8+ family homes for a substantial period of time during their 4 day vacation. And, not surprisingly, many, many times when the vacationers left the area, The Parents were one of the few family members who didn't get to see them during their stay. And The Parents were always pissed.

Back to The Cousins-who-were-good-friends. One summer, The Cousins came to the area to visit, as they did almost every year. Now, not only did The Cousin have family in the area, but her husband had a decent sized family, also--and HE was a 'local' as well. So, they didn't get to everyone's house during their vacations, as most people wouldn't. Again, this particular year, there was a gathering where everyone could visit with the vacationers and The Parents didn't attend, as was their MO. This had happened year after year, and I assume The Cousins got pissed at The Parents. So, one afternoon, a car drove passed The Parents' house, beeping its horn. The Parents looked out to see The Cousins driving by, waving. And they continued on and never stopped. That was their 'visit' to The Parents.

Okay, I can see why The Parents were not happy by this situation, but I also can see why The Cousins did this. Year after year, The Parents not going to see The Cousins was a slap in the face, so The Cousins decided to 'slap' back. This was a way to do it. And this caused The Parents to refuse to talk to The Cousins for a couple of decades.

Finally, The Cousins moved back to the area after retirement. They spent most of their time with The Father's youngest sister--one gossip (The Cousin) joining another gossip (younger sister), as The Mother said it--and they became 'thick as thieves.' Of course, this was a source of irritation for The Parents--and I heard about it often. Not long after this, I severed my close ties with The Family, so I didn't hear what happened next.

A couple of years ago, lo and behold, The Parents and The Cousins became close, once again. I don't know what happened, I don't know when it happened, and I don't want to know. The only thing I DO know is that neither couple can leave a shit without the other couple knowing about it, so I give this relationship five more years at the most. SOMETHING The Cousin or her husband will do WILL piss off The Father or The Mother and that will be the end of The Great Friendship, once again.

And people wonder why I am the way I am? With a family like I have, it's a wonder I'm not even MORE screwed up!

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Telepathy

Another good one from Not Always Right:


(The store I work in closes at 10:00 PM. It’s 11:30 pm and I’ve finished closing up shop, so I am about to leave. A customer comes up to the door.)

Customer: “Hey are you open?”

Me: “No, we’re closed.”

Customer: “Okay, but you ARE open, right?”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, we aren’t.”

Customer: “But I want to buy something.”

Me: “Sorry, you’ll have to buy it tomorrow.”

Customer: “Fine! You f*%$ing scumbag!”

Me: *thinking: what a b****!*

Customer: “I HEARD THAT!”

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

And I Get Shut Out Again

I posted how our goddaughter got confirmed without us being informed and last week we were shut out again.

The high school where K and I graduated from has an all-school reunion every year around the fourth of July holiday. While we have never attended, we DID go to our class reunions when they were held. I was never close to members of my class--I keep in touch with the two I care about: my husband and my oldest friend--but I have never said I won't attend reunions. However, this year I probably would have gone to the all-school reunion for one reason: it was the 100 year anniversary of the school. And I didn't know a thing about it until the festivities were all over with. I'm sure if we would have known ahead of time, we would have attended. And our Wisconsin friends probably would have come, also--she is the other member of our class that I actually like. ;) But, we didn't have the opportunity to decide whether or not we would be there, cause no one told us about it.

The high school anniversary is one thing--I could really take it or leave it. The other anniversary I knew nothing about is the one that really hurts. I know I have mentioned this before, but my great-grandfather was a lay preacher. He and my great-grandmother had a very great faith and were instrumental in establishing a church in the town they lived. K and I were married in that church. And the festivities for the 100 year anniversary of the church were also held last week. And I wasn't told a thing about it. THAT hurts.

I spoke with The Mother earlier this week--after all of the celebrations were done--and she mentioned them. I can't believe she was so matter-of-fact about the whole thing. She is so passively-aggressive in the way she 'punishes' me for all the 'wrongs' I have done. I wish I knew a way of handling this, but I guess my best bet is to stay far, far away from her. Still.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

???????

Obviously, I don't share the way a great many people feel, but I have to ask: What the hell is this country/world coming to? Have you watched any television today? Have you even had your television on? Every other channel is devoted to Michael Jackson. While the coverage of all of this has been absolutely ridiculous up to now, today is even worse--if you can believe it. I. DON'T. GET. IT. He didn't find the cure for some disease, he didn't have great wisdom to explain the meaning of life, he didn't save the world from any of the ills that are here, he didn't contribute anything significant but some songs and videos, and yet he is being deified and glorified more than any leader--governmental or religious--that I have ever seen. He was a man who groped himself in public and probably did the same to little boys in private--just WHAT is there to admire about him. I hope someone has enough guts--and doesn't look for the money the family will pay to keep quiet--to come out and tell the truth. Because, the truth IS out there.

Onstar Ready

We are coming up on the one year anniversary of buying our Envoy and that means we will have to continue our subscription to Onstar. We were given a free year of Onstar because the Envoy was a new vehicle, so now we have to decide whether the added cost will we worth it or not. And the cost is NOT a small amount. K was making noises the other day that we may just give it up. After tonight, I will do everything in my power to keep Onstar.

Our street was finally open enough for me to get out and do some much needed shopping tonight. This included going to the grocery store and Walmart. After I spent way too much time and way too much money in Walmart, I got to the Envoy and opened the hatch-back door and placed my purchases inside. For some reason or other--and I have NO explanation for this--I put my keys down on the floor near where the door hatch/closure is. When I closed the door, it must have hit one of the buttons on the remote, because the doors locked and the alarm started to beep. Of course, without the remote in my hand, I couldn't STOP the alarm. I had to stand and wait--in all my embarrassed glory--till the alarm stopped on its own. Thank goodness I had my cell phone in my pocket, so I was able to call Onstar and ask them to unlock the doors for me. It only took about five minutes and I was on my way. I cannot tell you how much I LOVE ONSTAR!!!!!!!!! I bow down to whoever came up with this wonderful technology.

Bowing 5

Monday, July 06, 2009

Discuss?

From the Daily Mail:

"A two-year-old Chinese boy is thought to be the world’s youngest smoker.

Tong Liangliang was taught how to light up by his father, who believed the habit would alleviate pain caused by a hernia.

The toddler now smokes a pack of cigarettes a day and throws a tantrum if he can’t get his fix.

‘The father wasn’t aware of how serious the toddler’s habit became until the child began to increase the number of cigarettes he smoked per day’, China Radio International reported.

Tong received his first cigarette at the age of 18 months in a bid to reduce the discomfort caused by his hernia. The boy’s tender age meant he was too young to have an operation."


I realize how hard it is to quit smoking--been there, done that. BUT... This world and the people in it continue to amaze me--and not always in a good way. :/

Sunday, July 05, 2009

The End Of A Career :)

On Postcards From Yo Momma today:

"When Tom was born he had to be under lights for several days. He looked like a movie star in sunglasses with a little black mask over his eyes. With you I pulled my hamstring muscle in my groin. I didn’t realize it until the next morning it was painful to scoot the few inches to swing my legs off the bed and stand up. When the intern came to see me- he was the doctor for the Peoria hockey team- he told me he saw that a lot in hockey players. My roommate said it had happened to her husband when he was playing baseball. I asked how long it would take to heal, she said “All I know is if you’re playing semi-pro, your career is over.” And that is why I never took up hockey or baseball."

Just caused me to chuckle. :)

Saturday, July 04, 2009

You Think???????



At the top of our street, a sign like the one above has been placed. This, of course, has to do with the fact that our road is still torn up and it is very difficult to drive on. The stupid thing about the sign? We live on a dead end, so there has NEVER been any thru traffic EVER! Stupidity at its finest. :D

One For 'Not Always Right'

I am a big fan of the website Not Always Right, so when I get an example from one of my own kids, I'm delighted!



On Thursday, The Youngest answered a phone call at the animal clinic where she works. The client wanted to make an appointment for her dog and Youngest set the time as 2:15 PM on Friday. Friday morning, Youngest had this phone conversation:

Youngest: ******** Animal Clinic. How may I help you?

Client: I am calling to find out if you are open this afternoon. My dog has a 2:15 appointment and I just wanted to be sure you all will be there.

Youngest: *?*



And she said this was quite a typical phone call. :D

Friday, July 03, 2009

Assclown Defined, Part 3


See that picture over to the left? He is the newest member of my Assclown collection. Why, you say? Here is the story from the Erie Times-News:


"The Canadian Football League fined Toronto Argonauts receiver Arland Bruce an undisclosed amount for "excessive actions" during his tribute to Michael Jackson after scoring a touchdown.

After scoring on a 21-yard pass that put Toronto ahead 6-0, Bruce removed his helmet, shoulder pads and uniform top, then laid down in the end zone. Bruce said he was honoring the memory of Jackson by pretending to be buried.

Referees gave Bruce two objectionable conduct penalties for his actions in the game, which the Argonauts won 30-17 Wednesday."


I mean, REALLY????????????? Yep, he's an assclown.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

So You Really Didn't Want To Host Thanksgiving Dinner?

I know I am a controlling person--well, at least as much as I am allowed to be. But, this is WAY over the edge. I found this posted on ackwardfamilyphotos.com and had a hard time believing it was true--until I followed the link to the blog where it first appeared. The woman who posted this said it was received by her friend's co-worker, whose sister wrote it. When you think you have seen everything on the interwebs, something this great comes along.


From: Marney

As you all know a fabulous Thanksgiving Dinner does not make itself. I need to ask each of you to help by bringing something to complete the meal. I truly appreciate your offers to assist with the meal preparation.

Now, while I do have quite a sense of humor and joke around all the time, I COULD NOT BE MORE SERIOUS when I am providing you with your Thanksgiving instructions and orders. I am very particular, so please perform your task EXACTLY as I have requested and read your portion very carefully. If I ask you to bring your offering in a container that has a lid, bring your offering in a container WITH A LID, NOT ALUMINUM FOIL! If I ask you to bring a serving spoon for your dish, BRING A SERVING SPOON, NOT A SOUP SPOON! And please do not forget anything.

All food that is to be cooked should already be prepared, bring it hot and ready to serve, warm or room temp. These are your ONLY THREE options. Anything meant to be served cold should, of course, already be cold.

HJB—Dinner wine

The Mike Byron Family
1. Turnips in a casserole with a lid and a serving spoon. Please do not fill the casserole all the way up to the top, it gets too messy. I know this may come as a bit of a surprise to you, but most of us hate turnips so don’t feel like you a have to feed an army.
2. Two half gallons of ice cream, one must be VANILLA, I don’t care what the other one is. No store brands please. I did see an ad this morning for Hagan Daz Peppermint Bark Ice Cream, yum!! (no pressure here, though).
3. Toppings for the ice cream.
4. A case of bottled water, NOT gallons, any brand is ok.

The Bob Byron Family
1. Green beans or asparagus (not both) in a casserole with a lid and a serving spoon. If you are making the green beans, please prepare FOUR pounds, if you are making asparagus please prepare FIVE pounds. It is up to you how you wish to prepare them, no soupy sauces, no cheese (you know how Mike is), a light sprinkling of toasted nuts, or pancetta, or some EVOO would be a nice way to jazz them up.
2. A case of beer of your choice (I have Coors Light and Corona) or a bottle of clos du bois chardonnay (you will have to let me know which you will bring prior to 11/22).

The Lisa Byron Chesterford Family
1. Lisa as a married woman you are now required to contribute at the adult level. You can bring an hors d’ouvres. A few helpful hints/suggestions. Keep it very light, and non-filling, NO COCKTAIL SAUCE, no beans of any kind. I think your best bet would be a platter of fresh veggies and dip. Not a huge platter mind you (i.e., not the plastic platter from the supermarket).

The Michelle Bobble Family
1. Stuffing in a casserole with a serving spoon. Please make the stuffing sans meat.
2. 2.5-3 qts. of mashed squash in a casserole with a lid and serving spoon
3. Proscuitto pin wheel - please stick to the recipe, no need to bring a plate.
4. A pie knife

The June Davis Family
1. 15 LBS of mashed potatoes in a casserole with a serving spoon. Please do not use the over-size blue serving dish you used last year. Because you are making such a large batch you can do one of two things: put half the mash in a regulation size casserole with lid and put the other half in a plastic container and we can just replenish with that or use two regulation size casserole dishes with lids. Only one serving spoon is needed.
2. A bottle of clos du bois chardonnay

The Amy Misto Family (why do I even bother she will never read this)
1. A pumpkin pie in a pie dish (please use my silver palate recipe) no knife needed.
2. An apple pie in a pie dish, you can use your own recipe, no knife needed.

Looking forward to the 28th!!

Marney


It isn't often that I am left speechless, but this is one of those times.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

When Will It End?

The unemployment rate in the state of Michigan is 14.1%--and I believe the UP is higher. (I don't have the figures close by at the moment.) It is the worst in the US, which has a rate of 9.1%. And things don't seem to be getting any better anytime soon.

The beginning of June it was reported that 8 of Michigan's prisons will be closed this year--five of them in the UP. That means more people will be out of work. BUT, there is a solution that has been proposed.

Remember the closing of Gitmo and all of those terrorist prisoners that are being held there? Well, one of our government officials has suggested that we might want to have these prisoners moved to the prisons here in the UP. I don't think so. FINALLY--not that I wanted it to happen, mind you--with the closing of the air base that was close to our town, we were taken off of any target map that any enemies might have. We no longer are a concern to anyone--we are just a rural wilderness that isn't a threat to any country. (And, most aren't even sure we are part of Michigan, much less the US.) So, if we are to house terrorists, we will be back on the enemy radar. (Yes, I realize this sounds ludicrous, but the terrorists in our world are NOT logical.) And who do we have to thank for this wonderful suggestion? Democrats. Don't like that I pointed that out? Tough shit. The dems have been in power how long now? Is ANYTHING better now than it was when Engler left office? I don't think so. And Granholm has had six years to improve things--and she has sunk this state even deeper into the shit. I hope there will be some level-headed people in power if this suggestion is EVER looked at seriously. I, for one, don't want to have terrorists living down the road from me.

My Toilet

When I move from this house, I'm taking my toilet with me. It needs to be repaired--it has a leak from the waterless tank (?)--but it is simply the best toilet I have ever used. The Turboflush 2000 (NOT its name, but should be) would flush a small animal down if it accidentally got stuck in the water. I have NEVER seen anything so powerful in my life. As a matter of fact, I tell everyone to NOT flush while sitting--I think the suction that would come from the flush would be enough to make a person stuck. And THAT would be a good story for the EMT's--but NOT one you would want repeated about yourself. When we bought this toilet, I had serious doubts as to how good it would be because it is a low-water flusher. I was concerned for nothing. I have never seen another toilet like this one, so I guess I will HAVE to take it with me.

I REALLY need a life if this is all I can find to do a post about. :D


Queue For Toilet