Friday, January 06, 2012

TMI--Once Again

Most women, as we get older--and especially if we have gained weight and/or ever been pregnant--tend to get incontinent.  This just is another way our bodies turn on us with age.  As I have been pregnant twice,

 have gained far too much weight to talk about,

and have stepped over that 'woman-of-a-certain-age' line long ago,

 I have three strikes against me and do have problems.

About four years ago, I had an 'incident' on a day trip that we took.  As we pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant where we were going to eat breakfast, I had a coughing fit.

Considering we had just driven for almost four hours, I had quite a full bladder and the coughing made my body 'give it up,' so to speak.  That day taught me to take an extra change of clothes whenever I was away from home for any length of time.  AND I also learned that there were products for women to use for incontinence.  After this, I don't leave the house without wearing a 'pee-pad.'

And I never had a big problem again--until earlier this week.

On Tuesday, we went for a shopping trip.  I know better than to have a lot of liquid before a trip, so I was looking forward to stopping into the IHOP
for breakfast--I NEEDED my morning coffee.

We pulled into the parking lot and K jumped out of the Envoy.

Just as I was getting ready to get out, an H3 pulled in next to us.  The guy--an early 30-something guy with wife and kids in tow--looked straight at me and gave a 'hey, lady, YOU can wait to get out of YOUR vehicle because I'M driving a Hummer' look.

(As if an H3 is a REAL Hummer.  :-P)  So, I sat and waited for him to get his kid out of the backseat before I opened my door.  Of course, I had to be VERY careful that I didn't hit his precious vehicle and I wasn't paying quite as much attention to the condition of the Envoy's running boards OR the parking lot as I should have--and they both were icy.

So, as I stepped down onto the running board, my foot slipped and I bounced off of the running board--and peed myself.  I then bounced off of the parking lot TWICE and peed some more.

 Immediately, I could tell that things weren't good.  As I peeled myself up from the pavement, I gingerly made my way to the back door of the Envoy so I could get my change of clothes.  I didn't stop for anything when we got into the restaurant--I just went directly to the restroom and proceeded to get out of my wet clothes.  We ate our breakfast and had no more incidents for the rest of the day--something that I was grateful for.

Okay, so I had an incident--AND I had myself prepared.  I was wearing a pee-pad, as usual, but it did NOTHING for me.  I am now contemplating the possibility that--on trips, at least--I may need to 'graduate' to something that will offer a bit more coverage.  YIKES!!!  Does this mean I have to wear full-on Depends?

 Or do I have to think about adult diapers?

I think I'm far too young to consider either!  Whatever I decide, my story gave my girls something to laugh about--little do they realize that the same problem just probably is in THEIR futures.


Anonymous said...

oh, I'm glad you weren't hurt. I'd have keyed a tiny bit of the H3 while I was pulling myself up. Just a bit, mind you-enough to make me cackle when I thought of it later but not enough so as to really damage it.

I haven't had kids, and I do wear a pee-pad, and (TMI here) I have to wear a thicker pad at night because when I get up in the morning, I have to go IMMEDIATELY and even if I manage to extricate myself from Daisy who demands a wake-up tummy scratch and blocks me from getting out of bed, I still start peeing and can't stop it.

The thicker pads aren't perfect, and if they're a little bit out of place, you wind up with wet pants. If I were you, on road trips I'd use the Depends. Who really cares what we have on under our blue jeans? I mean, we're not 20 and skinny and wear a thong that shows above our low-low-low-rise-why-bother-wearing-pants-jeans.

cmk said...

If I wouldn't have been so worried about getting my wet clothes off, I really think I would have keyed the H3.

I don't think I'm far off from having to wear a pee-pad at night. Whenever the cat sleeps with me, I have the same problem of trying to get myself untangled from the blankets and one of these days I WILL have an accident.

And my biggest problem WAS the pad being out of place when I fell. If things would have been correctly situated, I probably wouldn't have had quite the wetness that occurred. As I get older, I certainly worry less and less about what I look like or what I'm wearing and more about comfort. Depends will have to happen if it looks like they're needed.

I chuckled the entire time reading your comment. There are some things that are completely universal and I guess incontinence is one of them. :D

Anonymous said...

I wonder why this isn't discussed more? after all, it's a bodily function and nothing to be embarrassed about. So what if we have leaky plumbing? I bet there are lots of people who won't admit it.

I've seen those commercials for a pill that's supposed to help with urinary incontinence and I think I'll pass, after seeing what the side effects are. But I understand that some people might have a worse problem than me, and if I dribbled all the time I might take the pills.

Anonymous said...

This reminded me of a commercial I saw some time ago that made me grind my teeth every time I saw it, but soon after I posted about it, it stopped being on TV anymore.

Remember the June Allyson commercials? and now Depends (or is another brand?) has a commercial with this trim over-55 lady who's wearing rather tight pants and tossing her hair as she sashays down the sidewalk-and you'd never know she has a pee-pad on (or pull-ups, I think). I don't think that strikes the right note with me, either. Somehow I don't think that I would ever sashay down the sidewalk, tossing my hair, just because I was wearing "protection" that's (yeah, right) undetectable under thin clothing.

meleah rebeccah said...

Oh CMK!! I feel for you. If I sneeze, or laugh to hard - I definitely have a leaky situation. And it's NOT fun!

I am soooo sorry that I am laughing as much as I am right now. I can totally picture you all mad at the guy in the hummer, falling out of your own car, and peeing.

cmk said...

janet: My GYN talked to me about this every year--and he kept reassuring me that I could be fixed easily with surgery--WHEN I needed it. I still don't think I need it quite yet, but he no longer does surgery--he retired--so I wouldn't know who to go to to have it done. The Mother had her bladder done when she had her hysterectomy and said it was the worse thing she ever agreed to. However, she IS a drama queen and had TWO surgeries at the same time, so I can't believe the bladder repair--by itself--would be THAT terrible. I just hope I won't need to do it.

I don't get the commercials. Now, I'm not saying you need to be ashamed of having a bladder control problem, but do we really need to be PROUD of the fact we're wearing wetness protection? Unbelievable.

(And I agree about the side-effects of the drugs--SCARY!)

meleah: Oh, laugh away! My girls certainly did--and so did I. AFTER the fact, of course. ;)