Sunday, August 18, 2019

Dream, Dream, Dream

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I don't dream...at least, I don't REMEMBER my dreams, usually. When I DO remember them, they're very disjointed and a lot of the time, they cause me to have a very uncomfortable day. It's weird how a dream can linger and make you think about it long after it's over. And it's not as if the dreams I remember are frightening in any way, they just wind up starring people I haven't thought of in quite some time, or a time in my life that's long past. So the other night's dream caught me by surprise...it was very lucid and actually had a story line to it. It wasn't very interesting, but it was so fresh in my mind that I thought about it for a while after waking.

To begin, it started with me talking to a young man, probably a high school senior, about his college plans. I'm not sure where this took place, but the location of my dream very quickly became my house. It was my house, but it WASN'T my house...similar to where I'm living, but not exactly the same. The young man was there, as were my two daughters. They were the age they are now. My childhood dog was there. It was mentioned that he was 38 years old...and he made a mess on the floor. My father came in through the front door and we told him about the dog, who was his companion. The young man was trying to make up his mind as to where he wanted to go to school. He was quite distressed over the fact that all of the dorms were co-ed...he was a staunch Christian and had no interest in premarital sex. Then I looked out of the front window and saw a cardboard box on the snowbank. I was upset that the delivery person put it there instead of at my front door, but when I went to look at it, it was empty and hadn't been a delivery. The mailman (who was walking, not driving the truck) and I started to talk and he was complaining about the numbering of the houses on the street. I explained WHY the numbers changed from 1100s to 1200s in the middle of the street. And that pretty much concluded my dream. Very boring, but it stayed with me.

All day long, I tried to piece together the WHY of this dream. The only part of it that has any connection to my life recently, is the conversation about the street numbers. I had this same conversation a week or so ago with the guy who came to give me the estimate on the gutters for the house. Other than that, there was nothing going on in my life to prompt this dream.

And this got me to thinking about what I HAVEN'T dreamt about over the years:

I was very surprised that I never dreamt of my mother after she died...and I still haven't. For the first part of my life, The Mother and I were close friends..at least I thought we were. Then things happened. For many years, we were estranged and never got back to the closeness we once had. I'm quite disappointed in the fact that I have not dreamed of her...I feel as if this could bring me a sense of closure, in a way. Maybe some day.

I also have not dreamt of The Husband at all. I have not 'felt' his presence in any way, other than with the visits from the cardinals. I don't know if it would comfort me or make me miss him more if my dreams had his presence, so I don't even think about it or try to 'force' him into my dreams. I'm sure it will happen in due time and I will let it come naturally.

There are times when I wished there was a real explanation for why we dream and what they mean. It probably would save me from dwelling on insignificant things...and then again, maybe it wouldn't.

2 comments:

  1. I dream a lot (verified by Fitbit, thank you) but rarely remember them. However, I might carry the feeling from them with me into the day. I don't remember having dreams about people I loved who passed away - not my dad or my bff who passed in 2013. If I can remember elements of a dream, I can usually connect it to what I was reading or watching before going to bed. Sooooo, I try to watch a short sitcom or something before bed if I've been watching anything suspenseful...

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  2. For the most part, I don't mind remembering my dreams. I just really don't like the ones that stick with me all day long...kind of creep me out, actually, especially when they 'star' someone I haven't thought of in a long, long time. An old boyfriend, for example...

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