New Sites...For Me, Anyway

I have loved the LOLCats and LOLDogs sites for quite awhile. Just recently--yes, I'm not too observant--I found out that there is a Cheezburger network with a lot of other LOL sites. You can find news, sports, graphs, and more. It never fails that I have a good laugh while reading one or more of these sites. Today I found a graph that is particularly true:




Funny stuff!

Postcards From Yo Mama

This just made me chuckle.

Backstory: I was discussing with my mother how callous my family can be about the death of a loved one.

Mom: That is true. We are ruthless and efficient if nothing else
Me: it’s the German in us
Mom: Yep. Our motto is ” die already. We got better newer versions of you who could use some furniture”

(The comments are pretty good, too.)

From Postcards From Yo Mama.

How Very Mundane

Early in our marriage, I bought a lint 'brush' for clothes. It isn't a real brush, but it has a texturized pad that catches lint, fur, hair that is on surfaces. The head of the brush swivels, so it can be used in any direction, by right- as well as left-handers. It is the best lint remover I have ever used and I have looked for an exact replica since purchasing this one. In more than 30 years, I still haven't found another. The brush I have has no markings of any kind and no manufacturer's name on it. There is nothing I can use to do a Google search and look for a new one. In all of these years, I have never found a lint remover than I like as well, or that does a better job. I haven't found one that even comes close. To put it mildly, I treat the brush very kindly--I would not be a happy camper if it broke.

Wrong Number

About two months ago, I started to receive phone calls on my cell phone from a radiology associates' office. For one reason or another, I never happened to be around to answer the calls whenever they came, so I only heard the voice messages they left. This lasted for six weeks, when The Oldest told me I should call the place and find out why they were calling me. (I did a search on the interwebs and the office calling me is in Montana. I live in Michigan and have been no further west than Minneapolis.) When I finally called the office, I found out they were calling a wrong number. For whatever reason, they had my cell phone number for 'Michael' and said they would remove it as his contact number. All well and good.

Yesterday, I got a call from a hospital--in Montana. I called there today and they, too, were looking for 'Michael.' My number has been removed as his. Hmmmm.

I wonder where the problem is/was? Did the guy give the wrong number in order to skip out on paying his bill? Or did the first person he gave the number to type it in wrong and now all health care providers have the wrong number? It will be interesting to see if I get any more calls for 'Michael.'

Overkill

Today, the UPS truck came to the house and delivered a package. I put the TV/DVR remote on top as a size-comparison. The box was about five inches deep.




I opened the box and was greeted by bubble wrap.




As you can see, about a half-roll of the stuff was used to wrap my items.




This is what was in the box: three sheets of paper with window clings attached. While I'm happy they made sure my clings got to my house without being bent out of shape, I still think this was a bit of overkill.




By the looks of the last picture, I guess the Wing-mobile will be up and rolling again! (I haven't had anything but my antenna-topper--which is a helmeted Wing head--on the Envoy since we bought it a year ago.)

Minnesota Renaissance Festival

One of the highlights of our trip to the Twin Cities was attending the Renaissance Festival. It was so hot that that it felt like we were on the surface of the sun--especially while baking in the sunlight--and we were on our feet all day long, but we still had a good time.

The Festival is held south of Minneapolis. The property where it is held reminds me of our State Fair--most everything is outdoors, but with some permanent structures. The biggest drawback to the Festival is the lack of indoor plumbing--there were only Port-a-Potties. (I don't do anything that isn't full, indoor, running water, modern bathroom facilities.)

The entire area is very pretty, with quite a bit of shade trees--which came in very handy that day. Even though we got there way before noon, the place was quite busy--and definitely got MUCH busier as the day wore on. If nothing else, the Festival is a great place to people-watch. You see all sorts--people in costume (performers and non-performers) as well as the 'normal' people just visiting for the day. Here are some pictures of the property--and if you look closely, you can see costumed performers:



One of the performances that we got to see, was a guy dressed as Pan. (He is standing on the bench in the middle of this picture.) He spent most of his time insulting people as they passed by.




There was a performer who would argue with anyone and another guy who told/answered riddles. We saw an 'undertaker' walking through the area, dragging a casket behind him. He stopped a man and proceeded to 'measure' him for a casket. When done, the undertaker looked at the man and said, "I'll see at 2:30." Then he looked at the cigarette the guy was smoking and asked, "How many of those have you had today? I might see you earlier!" The smoker was NOT amused. :)

Everywhere you looked, there was a performer--or someone just dressed in costume. There was a woman playing a harp and a man playing a lute. All of the vendors wore costumes and some of them took it a step further by playing their parts perfectly with their speech and mannerisms. We saw a woman 'walking' her snake--I believe she was one of the snake-dancers--and this woman walking her tortoise:




I LOVED the kilt the tortoise wore.


Here is a picture of the king's men/soldiers, as they walked through the area:




Camel and elephant rides were offered--at least to kids:





Once we paid our entrance fee, other than merchandise and food, all of the sights and shows were free. As an inexpensive outing, you really couldn't beat this--as long as you didn't go overboard on the food and 'trinkets.' (I believe some people brought their own food and went back to their vehicles to eat, instead of paying for food.) I would have LOVED to eat more, but I was suffering from my 'travel stomach' and stayed away from most food. Dang!

One thing I DIDN'T stay away from was the merchandise. There was something for everyone there and I could have spent a boatload of money. I bought myself a couple of hair 'accessories'--can't really explain them, as they are quite unique--and some homemade soap for myself and a jar of sugar scrub for a friend. I really wanted a few more things, but between being tired and restraining myself, I passed. There were some incredible pottery pieces I would have loved and hand blown glass ornaments and glasses to die for. The jewelry just blew me away and, of course, the period costumes--or some elements of--were gorgeous. (However, WHAT would I do with a Renaissance costume?) There were shirts, jackets, skirts, etc, that could be worn everyday, but I was too hot to worry about clothes shopping. ;) K came home with a mug made out of wood--and it is usable for either cold or hot beverages!


A highlight of the day was the joust. While the jousts are 'scripted,' there still is a big element of spontaneity. If we wouldn't have needed to stay in the shade, our seats would have been better and we would have had a better view. However, we were fine where we wound up. Here is a picture of the crowd on one side of the jousting arena:




The jousting arena seen from the end, where we were:




The 'MC' of the joust:



The three knights who participated:




The pre-joust activities:




Victor--one of the participants:




William--another participant--and his 'Lady':




I knew, even before we went to the Festival, that I would enjoy it. However, I wasn't too sure about K. (The Youngest and her husband go there every year.) When we left, he was the one that said we would go back again next year--he enjoyed every minute there. I guess we will begin making plans for next year's Festival.

Police Log

These aren't really of the 'so funny I almost wet myself' variety, but they are strange in their own way.

--11:10 AM, boa constrictor escaped cage and house. Later found coiled underneath stove.

I DIDN'T want to know this. I live in my own little world and THAT world has NO boa constrictors anywhere closer than 3,542 miles from me.


--8:50 PM, large gray squirrel stuck in bird feeder, freed by officer.

I wonder what day of officer training this was taught?


--8:53 AM, rock thrown through window.
8:54 AM, brick thrown through vehicle window.
8:15, PM, tree branch thrown through window.

I guess the incidents escalated.


--11:14 AM, lost Nintendo in parking lot about two weeks ago.

So, did this person expect the cops to do anything about this after TWO fricking weeks??? Unbelievable.

Nevermind

A little over a month ago I bought my new cell phone and signed my new contract. A couple of days later I sent in the paperwork for my $50 rebate. Today I received a card telling me the rebate couldn't be processed because there was no service for the phone number. ACK!!! That did NOT make my day.

With a full head of steam and a boatload of righteous indignation, I called the help number. I was coldly polite and ready to unleash the hounds of hell on the customer service representative. We got the preliminary chit-chat over with and I supplied her with the information she needed to find out what went wrong. She read me the phone number that was written on the rebate form and that was when I knew where the problem was: I had supplied my LAND LINE number and NOT my cell phone number. OOPS!!!! I apologized profusely and we had a good laugh when I told her that I had been prepared to rip her a new a**hole over this entire deal, only to find out it was MY fault and not theirs. SHE was grateful that 'this time' it was the customer's fault. I should be getting my rebate check in less than a month.

Underwater Adventure

On the lowest level of the Mall of America, you can find Underwater Adventures. We had a good time. However, I think at $18, it was a bit overpriced. The setup is really cool, though. You walk 'through' the aquarium via a tunnel and all of the fish/sea life swim all around you. I was so much in awe of all of the fish, that I forgot to take pictures--although, from the ones I DID take, you could tell that they wouldn't have come out anyway. ;) I loved being in the tunnel when a sting ray, shark, or other fish swam over the top of the tunnel. As their bellies slid over the glass, you could hear the skin squeaking. Really kind of cool.

The best part of the whole place was the 'petting pool.' I got to touch a horseshoe crab, sea cucumber, and various anemones. Many of them feel, surprisingly, like velvet. It was neat to watch the anemones curl themselves up when their tentacles are touched.

One of these days I will learn the secret of taking pictures of swimming fish. Until that happens, this is what I'm left with:

I LOVED the color of this fish.

These are called 'moon jellies,' I believe. Really neat jelly fish.

I have some kind of fascination with piranha--I don't know why. Their teeth are VERY scary.




This was quite a large octopus. As a Wing fan, octopi hold a special place in my heart. ;)




A seahorse. They are so neat when they swim--their back fins flutter.




MANY seahorses. I love the way they hold on to the plants with their tails.

Another Rambling Post

As I said a few days ago, our street is finally paved. It is so nice to have that done! It looks good, too:

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Last weekend, we went on a road trip to the Twin Cities. The Youngest and her husband live there and we don't visit often enough. However, we try to get there at least once a year. It is always good to see them in their own environment--and to get to see the newest members of their household.

A couple of months ago, they had to put down one of their oldest cats because of kidney failure. However, they still have two dogs and five cats left. Wow. The animals they have are unbelievably great. The dogs are Australian shepherd mixes and the cats are of a great variety. The oldest cat--the 'pretend' cat (because he hides when we're there)--is all white, Peanut is a gorgeous tabby, Oscar and Lily are long-haired grey-and-whites, and the baby, Lena, is a short-haired tuxedo.

Lena is the last 'foster' that A brought home. Lena had some problems and had to have one of her back legs removed. I was concerned that I wouldn't be able to be comfortable around the cat, but she is amazing. Other than running a bit awkwardly and sitting down at an angle, nothing seems to stop this kitten. She is a regular kitten and as cute as could be. However, because of some of the drugs that were given to her, she will probably be a 'mini' cat and won't grow to a full size.

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We went to the Mall of America on Saturday. My big reason was to go to Lush, but K had a reason of his own: he wanted to get a Bret Favre Vikings T-shirt. He plans on wearing it to work just to piss off the Packer fans he sees on a daily basis. He can be mean. ;)

While we were at MoA, we went to the Underwater Adventure--the aquarium on the bottom level. It was quite neat, but a little expensive for what you get in return. I will do a post with pictures, later.

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On Sunday we went to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival. To say I had a good time is an understatement. It was quite unique and we have never been anywhere like it. We have every intention of going back again next year. I will do a separate post--with pictures--about the festival in the next few days. All I have to say is this: RUN, don't walk to the festival nearest you. It is an experience you won't forget--and fun at the same time.

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We all know that there are times when manufactured products don't work. And when you use the same product over and over and over again, you have more of a chance of finding that one example that is a dud. Yesterday, I had a 'dud' Sure-Click syringe. I went to give myself my weekly Enbrel injection and the syringe didn't work. Hmmmmm. I called the drug company's patient help line and I will get a replacement syringe tomorrow. This wasn't that big of a deal and now I know what to do if it ever happens again. However, I find it to not be a big deal only in hindsight. ;)

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Our grey squirrels are acting at bit 'squirrelly,' to say the least. I haven't read the Farmers Almanac, or talked to one of the 'old guys,' but I would thin the squirrels are getting ready for a long, cold winter. They have been running around our yard, burying acorns like there is no tomorrow. But, the way they are GETTING the acorns is what is so strange. They go up the tree and chew branches off. When the branches fall to the ground, then they strip the acorns off and proceed to bury them in our yard. And they do this ALL. DAY. LONG. Our backyard looks like a wind storm went through it.

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And, finally, sports. I have become quite taken with the Tigers and watch games whenever I can. They haven't done so well lately, but they are still in the pennant race. Anyway, it will be getting a bit interesting for me here in the not too distant future: baseball and hockey will be overlapping. Actually, it is happening already, as hockey has started the pre-season. (The Wings won their first pre-season game last night. YIPPEE!!) My family is really beginning to worry about me. I told them that the day they have to REALLY worry about me is the day I decide to watch football. THAT is the day they can put me in that purple padded room I have had on reserve for the past 20 years.

Words Of Wisdom

Live life like a dog. If you can't eat it or have sex with it, piss on it and walk away.

My husband's humor knows no bounds. :D

Road Trip

We are off to the Twin Cities tomorrow morning to see The Youngest and her husband. I think I will have to have a vacation from my vacation when we get back--our time is all booked for the four days we will be gone! :) Don't know how much I will be on the computer, but I will try to keep in touch. If not, I will be back on here early next week. Have a great weekend!

Yes!!!

Our street is finished. Hard to believe it finally is done.

Stuff Happening

Lesson learned: Going to bed at 10:30 PM causes one to wake up for the day at 4:30 AM.

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Tomorrow I have one of my regular appointments with my internist, so that meant a blood-letting. My doctor has recently moved to another practice, so I have had to get used to a whole bunch of new people. I HATE instructing these individuals on how to take care of me, but I'm old enough to know what I want and how it is to be.

I am having problems with one of the lab techs at this office. Yesterday was the second time I have had to have blood drawn by her and I was really hoping I would have had one of the guys instead. The last time she did the draw, I told her to use a butterfly, as every lab tech has done for the last 15-20 years for me. I also pointed out the vein that has been used for the same amount of time--it is the one that works every time a draw is done. (My veins are so bad that you'd think I took the 'sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll' anthem of my youth literally.) Reluctantly, she used a butterfly, but gave some convoluted excuse to hunt for another vein--which she used. Things went fine and I was okay with that. Yesterday, however, she refused to use a butterfly and gave the same half-assed excuse (something about the blood coming too slowly and the sample being unusable) that she did the last time. Instead, she 'wanted to try' with a needle. I was NOT a happy camper. She was lucky that the vein was hit the first time she tried AND that she didn't hurt me.

I don't understand what is with this woman. I'm wondering if it is an ego thing with her or if she just doesn't want to be told what to do by a non-professional. No one else has ever had a problem using a butterfly OR using the vein that is closest to the surface. I have never needed to go back and have a new sample taken because one was unusable. The first time a blood draw is botched will be the day everyone in that office finds out exactly who I am. And no one will ever forget me, that's for sure.

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A guy came to the door yesterday and said our street will be paved today. Finally. A job that was to take three weeks is now in its fourth month. But then they WERE right--the job HAS taken only three weeks, they just haven't been consecutive weeks.

I'm Sad

I knew the day was going to come, but I didn't expect it to come as suddenly as it did. Yesterday, I received a letter from my gynecologist saying that he is closing his office and retiring as of 15 September. I have had him as my GYN for 26 years, so this is very disconcerting news for me.

My GYN is only a couple of years older than I am, so I was shocked that he is retiring already--I expected him to work for another five years, at least. I guess I will be facing the retiring of my internist and dentist, next. This is one of the hardest things about getting older and I have not been looking forward to it at all. It will take me quite a while to get over this--if I ever will. I ADORED my GYN and always enjoyed seeing him once a year--as much as a woman could EVER enjoy her yearly exam, anyway. ;)

I think what has me most confused, though, is the speed of this retirement. I would never have expected him to give less than 2 months notice to his patients and it wouldn't have been surprising if the letter would have reached me six months ago. I hope I'm reading too much into this, but there seems to be a haste here that I find very surprising.

After mulling over the letter yesterday, I mentioned to K that there has to be more to this retirement than what is seen on the surface. I was very surprised by his confrontational response when he asked me, "Just WHAT do you think is behind it?" I told him that I was hoping this decision didn't have anything to do with the doctor's health or anyone's health in this family. K backed down and let it go at that. Later, I realized what K was asking me--whether or not I thought the retirement came out of the doctor's worry over the possibility of the health care bill being passed. The thought never occurred to me and I was taken aback to think K might be FOR the bill in any way, shape, or form. We don't talk politics a lot--mainly because I think we are at opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of what we believe--and it is best to stay away from it in every way. It's not easy living with someone who has opposite views than you on some important issues.

Police Log

--11:06 AM, false teeth on beach.

I NEED the rest of the story!!!!

Waiting For The Implosion

And we STILL have to hear about Michael Jackson 432 days after he died? Good grief.

Anyway, it seems that his family--who has exploited his death beyond belief--now are upset because yesterday's interment service has been widely reported by the media. The family drive from Encino to Glendale was televised AND the family had invited some cameramen to record the star-studded service, yet they were dismayed at the intrusiveness of the media. Can this family GET any crazier? I thought after the King of the Crazies died, things would calm down, but it's not to be. Seems as if there are more than enough nuts in this family to take his place--and we aren't talking La Toya, surprisingly!

Heed These Words

If you woke up this morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.

Taken Too Soon

Stieg Larsson was born in 1954 and died of a heart attack in 2004. He was an author and never saw any of his books published. However, he had delivered three manuscripts to his publisher before he died and they became best sellers in Scandinavia and Europe. They have been translated into English and two of the three have been published here in the US--the third will be out in January. After having read the two books, I must say that they are the best books I have read in a very long time. I can't wait for the third. Unfortunately, he never finished the fourth book in the series before his death.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo and The Girl Who Played With Fire are the titles of the first two books in the Millenium series. The stories are filled with crimes of varying degenerate degrees, but aren't extremely graphic. I guess I will say the descriptions are more than Law & Order and not as graphic as Saw. The character of 'the girl' is one that you won't forget any time soon. She is socially awkward and a complete computer genius--at least in the form of being a hacker. While the books seem to ramble in many different directions, they come together beautifully in the end. Both books take you on a wild ride that leaves you wanting more.

Not Always Right

This made me laugh out loud!

(A customer slams open the door to our indoor paintball field and storms in, shouting.)

Customer: “Where’s the manager?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m the owner. What is the problem?”

Customer: “I saw on your web site that you require a parental consent for kids to play at your field. Well, I never signed one, and my son said he’d been playing paintball here. He has bumps and bruises all over him, and I NEVER signed a consent form!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. He must have forged your name or had another adult sign for him. What’s his name? I’ll find the consent form.”

Customer: “His name is ***.”

(I find his form and show it to her.)

Me: “Is this your son’s form?”

Customer: “Yes! See, I never signed it!”

Me: “Ma’am, your son is 27 years old. Only children are required to have a parent’s signature to play.”

Customer: “But he is a child! He’s my child!”

Me: “I’m sorry, let me rephrase that. Only children under the age of 18 need to have a parent’s signature to play. Since your son is 27, he can sign for himself that he understands all of the risks involved.”

Customer: “This is insane! He could get his eye shot out, or be knocked out, or killed! This is illegal! I’m calling the police!”

via Not Always Right