Saturday, May 28, 2011

Adventures With Wildlife

I would never go into a court of law and SWEAR everything happened exactly the way I am saying it did, but this is how I remember the events...

Last night I had to go out to buy a new coffee maker.  When I woke up yesterday, I poured the water into the Bunn, as usual, but all I got was light-brown colored cold water instead of coffee for my efforts.  To say I wasn't pleased, is putting it mildly.  And I knew I had to go out shopping.

K is on night shift, so I waited until he went to work before getting myself ready to go out.  After putting myself together--which is a job in itself--I finally was ready to leave the house.  Just before I open the storm door to leave, I ALWAYS look out the window to see if there is anything sitting on the porch that might impede my exit.  I could have seen the neighbor's dog looking for a hand-out, a raccoon scouting for garbage, a bear checking out the bird feeders, or any number of other scenarios.  What I DID see in the middle of the porch, was a chipmunk.  Because our chipmunks are so tame, I refuse to open the door with one anywhere close by--I'm too afraid it will come into the house.  And we don't want THAT to happen again.  The chipmunk looked up and we glared at each other for a nano-second.  He KNEW I wanted him gone, but I could see the look in his eye that said, "In your dreams, lady."  Being much, much bigger than the chipmunk, I figured I could scare him off of the porch.  Yeah, right.  To try to get him to move, I decided to make some noise.  After I yelled at him, he laughed.  I stomped my foot and he stuck his tongue out at me.  I banged on the door hard enough to break my hand and he gave me the finger.  Finally, he sat up, looked at me as if to say, "I leave when I want leave," and s-l-o-w-l-y moved to the edge of the porch and jumped down to the ground.  The last I saw of him, he was going into the entrance to his den that is right next to our sidewalk.  I distinctly heard a maniacal cackle as he went underground--and I believe I heard him say, "I'll be back."  It's going to be a long, long summer.

5 comments:

kristi noser said...

...she mused as she dumped the rat poison into the hole.

cmk said...

And that would be happening in an instant if it wasn't for K--he's too afraid one of the neighborhood cats (which are NOT supposed to be roaming free) might catch a poisoned critter and get sick eating it. He's looking at trying to trap them. Oh yay.

kristi noser said...

Here is where you and I (and K) split and go in different directions. I figure if the roaming cats eat something poisonous, they won't be roaming any more.

ordinaryjanet said...

Maybe you can meow at it next time-he might think you're a big cat!

cmk said...

kristi: While I would never advocate killing pets, I figure death is one possibility people have to face when they let their pets roam. We have ordinances in this town and MOST people follow them. I'm sorry for those pets that have owners that DON'T follow the law.

janet: It might work, except I think the chipmunks consult with my cat to see just HOW crazy they all can make me. ;)