Dropping The F-Bomb

I have never had the word f*** as part of my vocabulary and at this late stage in my life, I don't think it will become common usage for me. In all my years of living, I probably have said the word a couple dozen times. And if you remove the times I 'sang' along to MC5 and their song "Kick Out The Jams,"--"Kick out the jams, motherf***ers" is the way it begins.--then you probably have less then a dozen times I have uttered f***. But, I don't necessarily run and cringe whenever someone else says the word--unless it is a little smart-ass, under 18-year-old trying to act like a big-shot! ;) (CAN'T stand kids who use the word.) Only on rare occasions will I quit watching a movie or show because of usage of the word. I live in the real world and realize people use it in the same way I use 'damn' or 'shit.' But that being said, I don't like the word and would rather not hear it. That makes my love of hockey an even bigger mystery than it already is.

Of all athletes, I think hockey players are the biggest users of the word. Every few games, an announcer will apologize for the on-ice mics picking up 'inappropriate language.' Even though I have never HEARD the word come over the air, I have SEEN almost every player say it at least once--and sometimes more than once per game! I truly believe it is the first word of English that the European players learn when they get here.

I have a theory about usage of the word in the NHL. I think somewhere, in every European's contract, there is a clause that states he MUST use the word at least once per season--preferably as often as possible. (The North American players don't need such a clause--they come by usage of f*** naturally.) At the beginning of last season,the only thing that kept me from believing my theory 100% were three players: Lidstrom, Datsyuk and Filppula. Last year I THINK I saw Lidstrom use the word--surprising, I know. After all, he IS 'the most perfect person,' as his teammates refer to him. Now, I only need to see Datsyuk and Baby Boy say it to know that my theory is true. I have high hopes that Datsyuk will use it this year--after all, he DID show a feisty side during the playoffs. (He had a couple of tussles and led the team in hits.) Despite his being the perpetual winner of the Lady Byng, he does have a darker side to him. Then we are left with VF. He never argues or says a word whenever he is sent to the penalty box, so I don't know if he will prove my theory. He's not too physical, yet, and doesn't get hot under the collar even when he gets hit illegally, so I don't know if he will 'honor' his 'contract.' So, I have one more reason I can't wait for the season: Seeing who will drop the f-bomb this year! :)